i chatted with the local guy yesterday...will call him "J" for identification purposes...
we decided to hang out monday night...get a pizza, watch a movie.
although we live about 10 minutes from each other, our schedules are totally flip flopped, and it makes it a bit difficult to plan times to meet.
he is out of town this weekend and i work all weekend so the plan is to meet up on monday.
now the one i refer to as the "new guy" said that "J" and i will be having sex by sunday...but since we aren't meeting until monday, i'm afraid he will lose that little bet ;-)

i'm not so sure if monday will be the night or not. "J" told me that he'll be in my pants in less than 3 weeks...
i'm just not wanting to totally jump into anything because i'm not looking for a one night stand so holding out a bit to see how he's viewing things...not giving him everything so quickly but trying to give him enough to stick around.

so will it be monday??
even on the first night we met, it was very difficult for me to keep my foot down and to not just beg him to slide inside me...
we played for like 3 hours before finally falling asleep and although it was an amazing time, the sexual tension proved to be a bit frustrating as well...

we'll see what happens on monday

found?

...
two nights ago a guy popped online who lives in my city and we started chatting...
we have chatted over the last 8 months or so now and he had brought up the conversation of meeting but it just never happened for one reason or another.
i'm not really sure why us meeting never happened. one time when it was planned he canceled, another time i couldn't make it and i just gave up on the idea of meeting him...until sunday night.
he came over to my place and we started watching a movie. nothing was planned between us...just to meet and hang out and go from there. he showed up my door
6 foot 3 inches
225
bald head
he gave me a big hug at the door and we were off to a good start
the movie started and a few flirtatious touches were exchanged...
he sat between my legs with them draped around him and i started rolling his shoulders
he smelled amazing
his eyes were closed and i heard him moaning and saw his body relaxed...
he got up, sat next to me, turned my chin to meet him and kissed me
it was a very gentle soft innocent kiss
his lips were thin but warm and inviting
and mine playfully wrapped around his and started sucking on his lower lip
my tongue slipped out and found his
nice and thick
we started kissing a bit more urgently and he stood up held out his hand and i got up and he led me into the bedroom
we didn't have sex but pleasure was definitely given on both sides
and around 1am we decided he would just crash at my place....
there are a lot of details so if someone leaves a comment wanting to know them, i can write another more detailed post explaining all that occurred during that time...
around 3am we finally fell asleep and he was on his way to work around 7am....
conversation flowed, we laughed, he is very affectionate and i think maybe i found what i have been looking for...
someone local
nothing serious
someone as horny as me...
as he left he gave me a hug and said he'd talk to me soon
i saw him again monday night....gave him a bj in his van before i went to work....
i'm going into this very slowly but it looks like i may have finally found him....

laid up with the hook up

... computer is still out of commission unfortunately but the upswing is that a friend of mine is letting me borrow his ibook until the pc gets fixed so i no longer have to drive to the library or pay to check my email... and the even better thing is that i am now actually laying in bed as i write this.
gosh i want one of these. any sugar daddys out there available?
i would like an ibook please, about 50 some cds and 20 some books and a ton of bing cherries to start ...will let you know if anything else comes up.
i had the most amazing phone sex the other night with "new guy"...
he had me do something i had never done before which at first i thought was strange until we got into it. he had my put a condom on my vibe....
fortunately i keep a box in my drawer for "just in case" moments (which i haven't had in a while now) and so i had easy access to one.
i did as he asked and put the condom on and was fucking my pussy like he would be fucking me...and then i remember telling him i wanted to feel his cum inside me and him telling me to take the condom off and stick it back in...and as soon as i did that i came hard and i heard him cum the loudest i have ever heard him...
i must admit i thought it was strange at first but the outcome was quite amazing actually...

have had no bed companion as of late except my borrowed lap top and my stuffed animals...the guy who responded to my ad is really cool but i just don't think things will ever work out.

not exactly sure how to find what i want...not wanting to give up but not sure how to get it...how do i go after what i want....

i haven't read any blogs for a couple weeks now....kinda focusing on my own stuff at the moment but am sure i can catch up here within the next couple days

would love to have something to cuddle with besides this computer and my battery powered toys...

sigh

explanations

haven't been online in a while now
computer malfunction
am actually at a place of business spending .20 cents a minute
to just try and catch up with things...
so until the computer is fixed, this blog will be abandoned
do take care of it

...
also received a very "awakening" email the other day
from a man's wife who i had been corresponding with...
i have not had an affair with a married man
however, i must admit in the past i have had phone sex with one or two...
and about a year or so ago, he was one of them...and we had exchanged emails as well
but never met
i never felt guilty about it really...played it off as innocent fun and flirting...
and have not been in contact with him in over 7 or 8 months now
but received an email from his wife
letting me know she found out about me and all the other women he had correspondence with
and was glad that he and i found each other since we both had no conscience or value as human beings...
i have never met this woman, but her words made me want to crawl into a hole and stay there...

so now i sit here with wounds, trying to lick them and carry on with my life

ramblings

* had the worst migrane of my life at work last night...got sick twice...sent home at 3am...took mingrane medicine at 3:30am...went to drug store at 7am...got sick in a plastic bag while purchasing medicine and a bottle of water...fell asleep around 8am...slept until 2pm...feeling much better

* sunday would have been my son's birthday...he would have been one...celebrated by making cookies and going to a movie with a friend.

* still talking to the guy who responded to my ad...have talked on the phone a few times now...still corresponding through email and although he is living in san francisco, if he does end up moving to st. louis, i think there will be a meeting there.

* talked to new guy on the phone the other night and was a good release for both of us.

and that's it for now