continuation

before i begin this story, i am adding a public service announcement (suggestion from oral man who just read this before i posted it) that scuba steve and i did indeed use a condom....i left it out cuz it just makes the story lose some "umph" to me......but indeed a condom was on until he finished....

and that was your public service announcement

now onto the story


"oh my goooooddddd" he moaned

i kept gently rubbing his balls in a circular motion, covering every inch.....softly rubbing him.
i looked up, his eyes were closed and there was a continuous moan escaping from his lips.
my hand was avoiding his shaft but i knew it was getting hard and was aching for attention.

he opened his eyes and looked at me, i turned my head to face his glance and he lifted his head up to kiss me.
i leaned in, my hand still rubbing his balls and we kissed for the first time.....not little pecks like we had exchanged before but the first passionate lips open tasting his mouth and tongue kiss.....
his lips were soft and warm and easily slipped between mine and i started sucking on his lower lip as i squeezed a bit tighter on his balls...
"mmmmmm" he moaned...and i felt it buzzing through my lips.
i looked up at him and smiled as my mouth opened a bite wider and my tongue slipped out to meet his.....
it was warm, wet thick.....my tongue glid around it as he moved his head to make his tongue go further into my mouth....
i felt my body getting warm, my pussy waking up from slumber aching for some attentino of her own......
my hand left his balls as he rolled me on my back following to lay so his legs were between mine and his cock was pressed up against my leg......it was hard and i could feel it pulsing on my bare leg.....
he started kissing me again...my neck first...licking all over the nape of my neck and then gently blowing on it.
gossebumps covered my body.
he lifted my shirt up and over my head to expose my already hard nipples and his lips pulled one deep as i felt his hand start sliding down my body......
my eyes closed and i felt the goosebumps come back as his hand went lower and lower down to my wet panties.....
"wow someone is wet" he quipped....
i smiled and then instantly moaned as i felt him rubbing over them.....up and down my slit, very gently......
his lips returned back to mine and the kissing became deeper and i tasted his mouth more as his fingers started pushing deeper into the matieral, pushing my wet panties back into me, soaking them with my juices...

his lips pulled away from me as he moved to put more weight on me, making his hand go deeper into the matieral. i started grinding to the rhythem of his hand and moanded louder as my hands wandered onto his back.
he pressed his lips on my neck and started biting me as his fingers pushed deeper and deeper into the material....he was going hard and fast and deep and i felt myself getting close.
my nails dug into his back and i felt my whole body tense up and then relax into an oragasm that sent chills all over me

his cock was now aching and i felt him moan as though almost in pain as i moved fully on me and slid my panties down.

my legs spread as he fell between them and my juices were so intense that his cock was already wet just from falling between my pussy lips.

he looked me in the eyes as he moved to place his cock right on my pussy hole.....his hands were on the bed on either side of me and i felt myself bite my lower lip as he slowly dropped his weight to start sliding into me....
i felt my pussy lips stretch as the head of his cock started sliding in, wider and thicker than my hole.....stretching it to fit his shaft fully inside me.

he slid all the way in, putting more weight on my body and then held it there, rocking back and forth, completely surrounding his cock with my juices...
my hand went to my clit and he looked at me and said "oh yeah keep doing that" and i started rolling it in circles as i felt his weight release off me making his cock slowly slide back out.
he pulled it almost all the way out only to put his weight fully back on me to slide it back inside.....
without hesitating, i put my feet flat on the bed to spread my legs wide, put my hands on teh back of my knees and lifted my feet off the bed....
he started fucking me harder and faster and my juices were so present that everytime he slid in me, it made a sucking sound......
my hands dropped from my knees and i wrapped my legs around his waist and he leaned down to kiss me as he started fucking me harder slamming into me as i moved my hips up to meet him in perfect rhythm.....my hands went to his ass, trying to push him deeper and deeper in as far as he could go......
my pussy couldn't get enough of him......so i pushed him in ....wanting every inch of him inside me.

he moaned as he felt my hands on his ass and i watched him close his eyes as little beads of sweat started forming on his shoulders and down his back........a little drop formed on his forehead and fell onto my skin as i heard him grunting and he moaned out
"fuck i'm gonna cummmmm"
his words pushed me over and my pussy clamped down around his cock as i came all over him.......
and he slid his cock out and came all over my tits
3 full spurts and each one caused his body to tremble, almost convulse and a loud grunt escaped his lips with each spurt.......
his warm cum squirted all over my tits and a few drops went onto my face.....i licked them off, tasting him.......as he collapsed onto my body to catch his breath.....

"oh my god"
he said

"yeah me too" i smirked

eating my words

"scuba steve is here with bagels", i typed....
"sounds like someone is getting fucked" he responded
"no not hardly, we haven't done that yet and probably won't for a while"
"yeah right" he quipped, "i want a full report."

i signed off greeted scuba steve at the door and after realizing how hot it was going to be and how i had no ac, we decided to go back to his place to hang out and crash....
i have slept over there a few times now....
since we work the same shift, there has been a few times where i have gone over there afterwards and ended up cuddling and falling asleep next to him.

we have kissed a bit but nothing further than that and i really wasn't expecting anything yesterday morning...

we had breakfast, watched some tv and pretty soon i started dozing off.....
"go into my room, i'll be there in a bit" he said.....

i dragged myself off the couch, slipped off my jeans and bra and crawled into his bed wearing panties and a tshirt...

i started dozing off again as i soon felt his body next to me......it was warm and he still smelled like his after shave. he layed on his back and said "come here darlin" and i scooted over to lay on my side with my head on his chest...
i draped one leg over his and he kissed my forehead as i turned and smiled at him and then he started playing with my hair and massaging my back.....

i moved up a bit and my lips were up by his ear and i started to softly moan
"that feels so good" i sighed and closed my eyes.
i took my hand and started gliding it down his chest and stomach and i heard
"feel" and i stuck my hand out to feel goosebumps all over his arm...

i giggled and continued gliding my fingers gently down his chest and stomach, over his arms and gently accross his face

"your hands are so smooth...that feels so good"

i continued......just barely tracing my fingers on his warm body covering every inch of his exposed skin.

i pulled the cover down to his boxers and then put my finger tips on his forehead.....i then slowly dragged them down his nose, over his lips, down his chin and neck, spread them wide over his chest and down his stomach to his boxers...my fingers went down further down his boxers on one leg avoding a certain area and once they left the matieral, i slid them underneath and back up his leg and then dragged them so gently accross his balls

"oh my gooooooood" he moaned

to be continued...

recapping

as i was re-reading a few entries i found myself getting confused with all the men lately so i decided i'd do a little recap on who is whom

scuba steve: the current guy i am dating....lives in my city, we were introduced by mutual friends. we have gone on several dates now and although we have not been very sexual yet, we are headed in that direction.

"j" is also a local guy that was my "fuck buddy"....we really didn't have anything but a sexual relationship. since i met scuba steve, we haven't hooked up, although he has made several attempts to. i am running out of ecuses with this one and need to decide what i want to do.

"chicago hook up" is an online friend of mine who reads my blog who i recently had a make out session with in a nearby city. we made out in a bar in a park and even in the doorway of a buliding. i hvaen't heard from him since and this was most likely a one time deal.

"oral man" is a man i met who reads my blog and i chat with online. we met at a hotel in a nearby city and he gave me the best oral i have ever had. we are planning on meeting again at some point.

"lou" is also a blog reader and chat friend of mine. we have not hooked up yet but he was the origional one i was planning on meeting but thigns fell through..... we are still planning on meeting at some point i hope (we are right lou?) ;-)

"sg" is one that i don't really mention on here anymore and actually just recently took him off my buddy list. he was an online friend of mine but things ended badly when i wrote a post about my take on men who cheat and since then he has wanted nothing to do with me.

"hd" was an ex of mine who i never mention anymore either.......he has been out of my life for several months now.

"ll" was a lover of mine that i had before "j".....he recently started getting back in touch with me and then stopped once again. i haven't heard from him in a couple months now. he was deemed the best lover i have ever had.

oh and "new guy" (geesh he'll think i forgot him) is an online friend of mine who i have phone sex with and who has become a really good friend of mine. he recently sent me 2 cds he made and some lovely panties......

and i think that pretty much sums it up

back before the sun

...
usually when i get off work, the sun is rising and i get to see a big beautiful sunrise on my way home and i always find a smile creeping accross my face....
this time however, since i worked 9 days in a row, i was sent home early so the company could lax on my overtime ( a trademark of this specific company)
so now instead of driving home to a sunrise
i was driving home to kids on their paper routes, scampering accross the dark streets and alleys.....
it reminded me of my days as a paper girl (oh memories) and i must say i was a bit surprised at how many people were out and about at 5:30 in the morning....
i guess since i sleep during the day, i forget there is life out there. working nights can really do a job on one's personal life and schedule.....

which reminds me
one of the bonuses about "scuba steve" is that he too works nights at a local hospital.....we work the exact same shift and so far have had the same nights off so it has been working out pretty well.....

yes he called me again, and yes we went out again.....actually have been hanging out off and on all week and we had plans to go golfing on saturday but now i'll be making a quick trip up to northern illinois to visit my brother, his wife and their new baby boy......

so i guess i'm dating, or going on dates or something.....i'm not sure. nothing physical has happened yet besides some hugging/cuddling and a kiss on the cheek.
as i look back in my past relationships (not that i'm in one right now....help me balancing statements!).... but one of the things i noticed is that i am usually the aggressor... usually the one who starts the phsycial side of things....i get anxious i guess (horny) and after i make the initial move, the guy seems to follow right behind me....

but this time i have decided to let go of the controls and see where he takes this.... see what happens. the kiss on the cheek was from him, the last time i saw him and i must say was one of the sweetest things i've experienced in a long time.

but in the process of this dating thing, i am still arranging a meeting with "oral man" and "j" has been calling and another guy i met from adult friend finder (who i have not mentioned yet) wants to hook up later tonight as well.... so my sexual pool hasn't dried up yet, although i haven't dipped in it for a few weeks.

i did get off tonight though thinking of a conversation that "lou" and i had earlier......and i was reminded of how damn good that moment right before the actual orgasm is.
sometimes i wish i could be in someone else's body when they cum, so i can see what it feels like for them. is it different for everyone? the same? that would be an interesting research paper.....

but my orgasm specifically......
it is most intense for me right before i actually cum.....sometimes i try to stay up on that ledge as long as i can.....let myself get right there then back off right there then back off...just so i can continue that feeling.... the build is the best part for me. granted the actual fall off the ledge is amazing too but for me it's the build up to it.......
i feel it all through my body even down to my toes and sometimes it's so intense that it almost hurts.
and then as it overtakes me and i cum, my whole body goes into a sort of trance and usually i shake afterwards.....and the feeling is, for lack of a better word, amazing....

a quirk of mine that i have when i'm with someone (as oral man found out) is that when i cum, i tend to lose track of what's going on around me and how my body responds...... if i cum really hard, i usually end up slamming my foot down on the bed. it caught "oral man" off guard at first but i think once he got used to it, he knew it meant a very good thing was happening.

and the other thing i do is shake.....if i cum really hard, my body convulses afterwards and sometimes i shake like i'm shivering and can't get warm....

all part of the deal i suppose

scuba steve

....
we talked on the phone ..making arrangemenets for our "date"
he seemed a bit reserved but conversation flowed nicely and he made a comment that i looked cute and that he was excited to meet me.

i must admit i wasn't looking forward to it. i haven't been out in the dating scene for quite a while now and i just remember it sucking for the most part so i definitely wasn't going into this thinking destiny was going to bring me someone to sweep me off my feet...

backing up......i'm calling him scuba steve because of a conversation we had on the phone about adam sandler movies and he quoted a scuba steve line from big daddy and there was born "scuba steve"

so we decided to meet for coffee and since i didn't know what he looked like, i was to get there first and wait for a strange scuba steve man to approach me.

i wasn't really nervous until i pulled into the parking lot and parked my car...then i found myself looking all around me and over my shoulder, waiting for some man to tap me on my shoulder and say "hi i'm scuba steve".....

i walked in and there were a lot of people there but instead of looking around trying to get him to notice me, i decided to sit down at a table and take out a notebook and pen....
i started scribbling down notes and things i needed to do and started doodling a bit when after 10 minutes or so a man came up to me and said "rachael?"

"here we go" i thought. i looked up at him and was pleasantly surprised.... glasses, tall, lots of thick brown hair and even had a bit of meat on his bones.....
he stuck his hand out, i returned and his hand was nice and big but a bit sweaty....
"nervous?" i asked him, as i turned his palm up to reveal the sweat....
"yeah i am..... you?"

"not really" i said......"i was a bit when i pulled in cuz i realized i had no idea who you were but i'm fine now"

he got up and ordered a coffee and got me a vanilla tea and then sat back down to join me at the table....
conversation was a bit awkward at first but soon flowed as we got onto the topics of movies and food and random general talk. it seemed like i was sitting there talking to a friend. very comfortable and easy..... we started talking about our families and what we do and our lives and before i knew it, hours had passed....and i had about an hour before i had to go to work so.we decided to take a drive around the city since it was a nice cool night and talk some more......

we got in my car and started driving around talking and laughing and i'd see him looking at me out of the corner of my eye from time to time......finally i turned to him and said "what?... you keep looking at me"

"your picture doesn't do u justice"
"oh please" i said.....
he just looked at me and smiled and i felt my cheeks blush and then i turned my eyes back to the road.....

i must admit in the back of my mind i wondered if this was going to be like my other recent experiences.....if this was going to turn sexual ....if that was what he was really wanting....i was definitely on gaurd waiting for some sort of sexual topic to come up

but it never did

i drove him back to his car, i got out and gave him a hug......we exchanged numbers and he said he'd call me the next day.....

as he drove off and me to work, i thought of how nice an evening it was but was sure he wouldn't call me the next day....

but he did

"bullshit"

...
when i was younger and lived with my parents, i was very involved in a church group and many weekends would find myself at someone's house playing cards and eating pizza or some such "clean Christian fun"....and one game we used to play a lot was a card game where you had to lie your way through in order to win....it was called "bullshit" but since we were good Christian kids at the time we called it "pineapple"......but basically it was a bluffing game that i totally sucked at.
but i was thinking back on that game and it gave me an idea for a post.....

my sexual adventures have led me to some interesting places...some kinkier than others and some i feel are even too much for this blog so i have decided to do a "bullshit" post.....
a list of sexual acts
some of them i have really done and some of them i haven't......
and ofcourse i'm not going to distinguish which ones are true and which ones are false....but this way i can even let my kinky side out without exposing myself too much.....
i will start off the list with a true one....

* i have been fingered and gotten off in a movie theater with people 5 seats down from us

* i have cybered with a 19 year old gal

* i have had wax poured on my back

* i have been blindfolded and handcuffed and had different kitchen utensils used to get me off

* i have been the receipient of a golden shower

* i have been a participant in a "group sex" outing

* i have cybered with a 17 year old guy and his younger cousin

* i have fucked a guy with a strap on while he was blindfolded

* i have met a guy from online sight unseen in less than an hour of chatting with him

* i have had photographs taken of me in different sexual positions and acts

* i have had phone sex with one guy while another guy was listening in

* i have had a "drildo" (drill turned into a dildo) used on me

....
and there concludes my bullshit list.......
at least for now

back among the moved

well i'm finally moved
and i didn't have to give any bjs....
i have boxes still to unpack but everything is out of the old place
and my phone is set up again so i'm back in business....

not too much to speak of.....
i've blown "j" off a few times just because i haven't been in the "mood" with moving and then getting the flu and strep......

in other news...i'm actually getting set up on a date.
a couple friends of mine keep telling me it's time to get myself back out in the dating scene...it's time to move on. so they are setting me up with a guy who i've now nicknamed "scuba steve".....we are supposed to meet sometime this weekend on a sort of blind date excursion thing. i've never done the whole blind date and not too excited about this whole date thing but i'm going to go through with it, partly just to get my friends off my back. i guess he saw my pic and said i was cute so at least i know he won't be scared off when he sees me......
so we'll see how that goes.

making arrangements for a second meeting with "oral man" ...the guy who gave me the best oral of my life....i am anxiously awaiting to feel that tongue again...

fun with ice cream

i'm in the middle of moving and it sucks.....
granted, i'm only moving approximately 50 feet away, but still.....
i've got shit all over the place, garbage bags full of half-used candles and shampoo bottles that i'm just pitching so i don't have to deal with it.
i've got some stuff there a lot of stuff here stil and damn this alone makes me wish i had a man to help me. my friends are all out of town for this dumb holiday thing ....did my landlord not know i have a life? bastard...taking all my friends away so i have to move by myself. even a single girl can aquire a LOT of stuff....i'm talking a LOT.......and lets not even go into my furniture......
hey i'll give 2 bjs for some help with my couch
maybe even 3


ok so to escape from all this packing nonsesne, i decided to go to mcdolands for a wonderfully smooth vanilla cone. since its still pretty warm here, as soon as i got the cone, it started melting down the cone and onto my fingers......so as i stopped at a red light, i started licking it all off....licking it off the cone, my fingers and trying to keep the mess in check.....
i just happened to glance over and see an older man (probably in his mid 50's) and he had this huge grin on his face and nodded at me.
feeling a little flirtatious, i turned to him and started seductively licking the ice cream cone (yes that is possible) and his mouth dropped open and i knew it was doing the trick.
some ice cream dribbled on my finger so i stuck my tongue out and started licking it off and then put my finger in my mouth and sucked on it. the look on this guy's face was priceless....
pretty soon i heard a honk of a horn and realized the light turned green....
he looked a bit embarrassed and then headed off.......i smiled at him, he winked at me and we went on our way....

ice cream can be fun

in the beginning

...
when i first started this blog, i looked at is as a quest...not only to seek a new lover but to expose parts of me that nobody new about....to get it all off my chest and never let myself analyze it to a point i didn't recognize my thoughts anymore. i wanted them to be raw and undeleted and whatever emotion came out, i wanted to embrace it and not question or hide from it. that's why i made the "do not delete a post" rule....because i decided if i was willing to sit down and write it all out...it must have met something, whether or not the thought was true and could be backed up with more than emotional feelings....

but somewhere along the line, i lost focus and started analyzing my words and getting too wraped up in other opinions...somewhere along the line, my blog lost it's purity and i found myself in a very empty place.

i opened myself up to someone and a dream formed inside me that this guy may be the one to finally put all my other experiences to rest....i believed in every word he said and didn't even let myself think he was just leading me along......i just threw all caution to the wind and let my heart feel very deeply for someone....it had been a very very long time. i thought about our future apple tree and all the dreams we had talked about and then just like that, all those dreams were gone. just like that he questioned me and whether i could be true to him and questioned whether i was being honest to myself....and just like that, i felt like i was standing there naked and all i wanted to do was hide....

and i wanted to turn to my blog for comfort and to let it all out, but i had turned it into a stranger.....

so last night at work as i separated myself from everything and everyone, i decided to pick the pieces up once again and continue on. i'm not going to delete those recent posts but i'm not going to look back...i'm going to move forward.

it's me time again and this blog is mine....i'm reclaiming it and anyone who wants to read it is more than welcome but it is time for me to take charge again....not only of this blog but of my life.

sometimes i worry about the guy i may end up with one day....if he can handle all the baggage i have accumulated but right now, that doesn't even matter......

so all that is off my chest now.......and here i start again

here i start again